Friday, May 28, 2010

Newark: A Great Place to Visit...If You're A Bullet

Just in time for Memorial Day, from the New Jersey Department of Tourism: Still unsure of your holiday weekend travel plans? Head on out to picturesque Newark! It's totally safe to visit - We just had our first murder-free month in 44 years!

Welcome to Newark!
Homeless people, hookers, and crack bums
There's nowhere they won't poo.

Props to The Sexy Armpit. Always doing Jersey proud, Jay.

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Jack White & Jay-Z: Look! It really did happen!

Via Nah Right, proof that the Jay-Z/Jack White collaboration of your dreams did very much happen in real life.

"Ray Bans" should be the dopest of dopeness. In the meantime, here's "Got Yourself A Cannon," the Jay-Z/White Stripes mash-up from the still-awesome Stars & Stripes.

Live from New Jersey: The Freakin' Super Bowl!

On a day that had already brought us an unprecedented collision of Jersey icons, we got some even bigger, fist-pumpin-er, Garden State news when it was announced that the Super Bowl would be coming to the Meadowlands in 2014. New Jersey was already home to everything that was ever great in America, so this was only natural and a long time coming.

Which exit? How about that one, smartass?

Some will whine, "But what about the weather?"

What about you shut your freakin face? This is football! What, is your vagina gonna freeze?

Some will cheer, "The Greatest Game in the Greatest City! NYC 2014, baby!"

But make no mistake, this is New Jersey's Super Bowl. New York might host the parties and (hopefully) the victory parade, but everyone knows that the Giants and Giants Stadium are New Jersey. Period, end of sentence. And yeah, that's Giants Stadium. You can stick your $500 million naming rights where the sun don't shine... South Jersey.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Worlds Are Colliding! [Needs More Bruce]

Just saw this headline on that nearly blew my mind:

Did Bruce Springsteen stay at the MTV 'Jersey Shore' house?

New cast-mates enjoying the infamous hot tub?

Could it really be? Did these two great New Jersey institutions and Schiff Happens favorites come together at some point this winter? The video in the article gives us only a thinly veiled, winking acknowledgment from the Seaside Police Chief that The Boss may have visited the house, so I'm gonna bet that it didn't happen on account of the world didn't explode. However, if these allegations are true, does this make the Jersey Shore house Springsteen's most famous residence since 7 1/2 West End Court? Did he get any classic songwriting done like he did back in that little Long Branch house?

"Well, Paulie D and The Situation well you know they're gonna be there.
Sloppy Snooks, RonRon, and Vinny they'll be comin' up for air..."

One thing we do know for certain: The Guidos got hoagies. Also, is there a more Situation sandwich than baloney, cheese, and mayo? I'm so glad this show is almost back.