No Texas festival for Phish, says Fagot farmer

Watch as a local news anchor introduces this story, describing how a video on Phish's official site went viral and created rumors of a late summer festival on a Georgetown, Texas farm. Then watch as the ensuing story, starring an unfortunately named farmer with a sweet mullet who confirms that there is no chance of Phish holding a summer-ending festival on his property, seems itself to have been scripted for viral glory. Small-town irony, gotta love it.



Fans tracked down the Fagot farm from his promotional video posted on the band’s web site.

Mullet Monday!

Sorry if you missed me during a busy weekend and portion of a Monday, but here's a little something to put a quittin' time smile on your face (if the fact that it's quittin' time doesn't make you happy enough).

"If you ladies continue your unruly behavior I will be forced to use my baton."

Species: Rent-a-mullet, Mull Security
Spotted: Scott Staium North End Hillside, Charlottesville, VA
Notes and Conclusion: Potentially a frat boy volunteer, but more likely a jobless degenerate, the Rent-A-Mullet is hired by a stadium, concert hall or strip mall to patrol the premises and appear as a symbol of authority for 8 bucks an hour. The mullet is kept tight, as is the Event Staff polo, for purposes of intimidation, but the Rent-a-Mullet is known to be mostly harmless. This species is fairly common because the job appeals to the mullet's aggressive predisposition to activities requiring potential physical force or use of weapons. Ironically, most Mull Security are slow-witted, overweight and out of shape, so streaking drunks are likely to blow right past him while his gaze remains firmly fixed on the scantily clad, likely underage female fans in the distance.

Mullet Monday!

In what may already be my favorite feature of this fledgling blog, I present to you the first installment of Mullet Monday! I'll brighten up the start of your week with a new specimen every Monday. As an aspiring mullet hunter, I'm still on the prowl for the next rare, exotic breed. I invite you all to join in the hunt with me, and submit your best work to be featured in an upcoming Mullet Monday. For now, I simply invite you to feast your eyes on a true marvel of nature.

"I'm telling you, if you play Come Together backwards it totally says 'Get er done!'"

Possible Species: British Mullet, Abbey Roadllet, I Am the Mullrus
Habitat: St. Johns Wood tube station, Northeast London
Notes: The first mullet I ever captured in the wild. During my semester in London I decided one afternoon to check out the famous Abbey Road Studios and zebra crossing. I never had any designs at all to hunt mullets until I ascended from the tube to the street and saw this mysterious foreign breed. I was at once amused and shocked by the existence of a Limey mullet, which I had previously believed to be solely an American creature.
Conclusion: This mullet is delicately groomed and maintaining a civil phone conversation in close proximity to the other man. The uncharacteristic lack of American mull-rage suggests the gentility of its British cousin, but could this be a patriot in Doubmull-oh-seven mode, plotting to defame the famously mop-topped Beatles by mulletizing their Abbey Road merchandise? Not out of the question, as a confused mullet may very well have misinterpreted the Fab Four's "British Invasion" of America some 40-odd years ago.